:The Phases and Faces of Hypomania
Some people will be quite forward with me, “you’re doing my head in. Go away.” My partner, and nurses on a ward mainly who refuse to talk to me unless I stop pacing around them in circles as fast as my feet will carry me. Other people try to be more discreet, “I’m just going to go downstairs”, “I’m just going to go and get a drink.” and “I’m tired. I’m going to bed now” are all hints I’ve received under the suspicion that actually, I’m just doing their head in.
I know it. I can sense it. Do I care? Not really. I will want you to stay because for that moment you are my entertainment source to spout all my nonsense onto, to force to dance with me and to dance around in circles like I’m a witch dancing a hokey pokey to some form of witch craft ritual of absurd movements, expressive jumps and jaunts of the body.
Tactless as ever, I’m not a very tactful person at best, I will say, “I’m doing your head in aren’t I?” That won’t stop me though, even if you answer ‘yes’. I will observe that I am annoying everyone around me and continue regardless. I will ask and say things that make people feel uncomfortable and keep on about it, like how you should get a girlfriend and lets set up an online dating profile for you, about how you guys make a cute couple and I bet you have really great sex, and observing out loud that complete strangers are ‘fit’ or that ‘I’d bang them’. This isn’t how I would normally talk. Banging in this context doesn’t usually enter my vocabulary because not only do I have the guts to say anything and everything, I go that mile extra with a whole bag of zero fucks to give about saying it.