As I mentioned in my last post, I’m starting to get symptoms of low mood. One of these includes chaotic eating habits. The start of which is always binge eating because of emotions, mainly and namely on chocolate too. Which isn’t helpful for any health goals I may have in aiming to reduce body fat % or overall weight. You see, it’s very simple.
I feel something, sadness, hopelessness, anxiety, anger, whatever it may be then I go to the Sainsbury’s across the road- sometimes ashamedly in my pyjamas – and I buy binge food amongst normal healthy food to disguise my antics. I’ll buy some bananas and strawberries that I’m not interested in, than just as I’m about to go to the self service desk, and always the self service desk, I grab loads of chocolate and biscuits and BAM! I run home as if I’ve committed a crime and I eat and eat and eat until it’s all gone.
Then, ironically after the sugar high has eased off I feel even more low than before by about 5 notches on the emotion meter. It’s ironic. It makes no sense whilst making perfect sense and this ladies and gentleman is classic emotional eating.
I can see that I do it. I’m admitting to it and it needs to stop. Therefore, I’m going to stop counting calories and eat 3 times a day with fruit for snacks again, in the hope that regular eating will nip this habit in the bud because then when I’m feeling like doing it I hopefully won’t be physically hungry so I can use distraction techniques and DBT skills in order to find out a) what is bothering me and b) control the urge. It’s like the final stages of recovering from bulimia all over again, except fortunately I’ve not been purging.
Another step I’m taking to battle this problem is to give up all chocolate for 100 days. Chocolate you see is the problem with me. I eat chocolate mousses, and chocolate sundaes, chocolate ice cream and chocolate pennies, and hot chocolate covered in chocolate everything. It’s my go to food for binging. I can’t eat it healthily or in moderation. I am finding that I have to eat it by the bucket load, and that’s not OK because it’s making me feel like crap. So in order to get out of the habit of craving chocolate I’m going cold turkey for 100 days starting today. Wish me luck. I’m going to need it.