My weight loss journey so far has been steady and slow. I’ve lost a few pounds, which I’m happy about despite totally falling off the banwagon with calorie counting this week – which proved a better diea when I was calorie counting because without counting calories old ED thoughts crop up of, “isn’t that a bit too much?” and “Right, I won’t eat for the rest of the day now” and “Do you deserve that, you should be hungry”
For some in my position calorie counting may seem counterproductive but I have a fitbit which tells me how many extra calories I’ve earned in a day, therefore telling me how much extra I can eat. Which I find helpful in maintaining my goals and limits, and in not getting ED thoughts. Therefore, as of tomorrow I’m going to calorie count again, which means eating a lot of packaged foods, and not really cooking but it’s ok because I choose the healthy options meals which satisfy me and are healthy enough until I feel ready within myself since my breakdown to start cooking again. I’ve barely been cooking you see, because it feels like too much of a task for me. It overwhelms me. I don’t know how people do it, shower, wash, eat, clean AND work. I barely manage to do the precursors to my AND, and I’m unemployed with a minimal amount of activities happening for me each week.
I am pleased with my progress though, especially as I’ve had quite a nasty cold which has prevented me from exercising. I am going to start exercising either tonight or tomorrow though, as I have a climbing workshop for 4 hours, and I’m thinking of going for a swim tonight. I found it very peaceful and relaxing last time. I’ll see how I’m feeling as I’m feeling quite run down again, or rather still, but think I will be better by tomorrow. Mind you I’ve been saying that all week and it keeps coming on back but we’ll see. I’m going to have to take it one step at a time until I’m ready to start exercising again, but as for my weight loss, I’m happy with my progress although it is nothing to shout home about just yet. I’m excited to finally reach my goal weight so I can fit back into my clothes and feel nice about myself again.