I wrote about this last time, but it is something that is really bothering me. I’m overweight. However, here’s the cinch, I do not think of myself as *that* fat. My body image isn’t perfect – who’s is? It’s not that bad either. I haven’t sworn myself to living in “fat pants” and oversized sweats – not yet. I will still wear leggings and shorts and dresses. SO what? I’m not as small as I once was – but that was unhealthy.
Now, my action plan is a calorie controlled diet and exercise. I have a Fitbit and My Fitness Pal has creeped back into my life, but it’s not necessarily a bad thing because overall I could become much healthier because of this incident.
I’m going to label it an incident because it is no longer a mini crisis in my mind, and no longer nothing either. Just an incident that can be solved by blood, sweat and tears – well, maybe not the tears. I might try and skip on the tear if I can.
Since I’ve been calorie counting these past few days I’ve realised just HOW MUCH I was eating before – and heigh ho, I thought I was eating moderately. Apparently not. You see, these medications of mine are supposedly weight neutral but I just want to graze and graze and eat at every opportunity. In the train station – OMFG those pastries smelt SO good. Walking past corner shops full of chocolate bars has become hard for me. There is the most amazing bakery at the bottom of my street that you can smell for literally a mile away, and I haven’t even been able to try it out yet: but I can save that for a treat day in a few pounds time.
Back to that pesky medication – I have no idea at what rate I’m going to lose weight, and that is something quite daunting for me. What if I remain gaining? What if I don’t lose quickly enough, and by quickly enough 2-3 lb a month would do me fine – THERE’S NO CRASH DIETS TO SEE HERE GUYS! This whole, losing weight the healthy way, and actually EATING to lose weight, and exercising followed by eating is new to me. However, perhaps it is a blessing as I want to work in nutrition and health so it will give me some experience to relate to my distant future patients with. So maybe it’s not all bad after all, just maybe.