Anticipating Change 

Whilst when I went away to Prague, I was anticipating change in my routine and surroundings for 4 days. However, this was a planned change for a temporary amount of time. Now the possibility of permanent change in my environment and surroundings looms over me and I feel a mixture of excitement, anxiety, anticipation and fear. I migh tbe moving house: yet it is worse until Wednesday when whether or not I move is confirmed because it is the unknown of whether or not I am moving that rears over me. The, I could be moving, but I could also not be moving anticipation is eating me up inside. I’m trying not to focus on that right now, but it is difficult not to. On wednesday though, I will be having a big day because like I said, I will be finding out if I am moving into supported accomodation in a new area of my borough or not. 

I went to look at the place last week with S and my CC. I liked it, and the room that was goign to potentially be mine I can imagien myself living in. It’s a small place, with my own kitchen and bathroom – but I can live with a down size in space because I’d also have access to the grounds including a garden which would be amazing in the summer time. 

But the area is new. It’s outside of my comfort zone areas, and just on the peripheral of where I know: which makes me anxious so if I do move there, it will be a big thing. 

I hope more so though, that I do get to move rather than staying listening to the domestic violence downstairs. That’s for another post but it affects me. 


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